Unstoppable PC Review 5/10 "You play a bicycle courier, tasked with delivering a mysterious package to a skyscraper" 🩸🔨 @unstoppable_go #IndieGame #GameDev

When I saw the trailer for Unstoppable, I thought “smacking things with hammers and crowbars until they die – right up my alley!” and eagerly volunteered to review the game.

But we all make mistakes. 

Unstoppable comes from Korean indie software house Funnylocks Corp. You play a bicycle courier, tasked with delivering a mysterious package to a skyscraper. Somehow, this package triggers a zombie-like transformation of the building’s inhabitants and, as you’re still in the building (but somehow unaffected – maybe the lift has HEPA filters in it), you must battle your way out, using the weapons and supplies at your disposal to dispatch as many enemies as possible. 

The game opens with a couple of little videos to set the scene. Translation here is a slight issue, with a mysterious character asking “Has the night runner ready to go to Schindler Tower for delivery?” and confirming for us that “It will proceed without any problems”. Good news, we don’t want any problems. On delivery of the package, the receptionist contacts yet another shadowy figure who gives us a little more exposition with “My revenge is finally beginning”. So far, so Zero Wing. OK, so there’s a couple of translation issues and spelling mistakes (you can change the “Diaplay mode” from the menu), but given that I can’t speak any Korean at all, they’re doing better than me. Cutscenes aren’t everything. 

But as we’re on videos, let’s move to graphics. As you might expect with a game that has presumably been translated from another language, the lip syncing of the characters in the cutscenes is pretty off, but this is an indie game from a relatively small team of developers. It’s probably unreasonable to expect any different. But elsewhere in the game the graphics are pretty dated. Level layout is pretty simple. Although the lighting they’ve put together is actually quite nice, it isn’t enough to save it graphically as everything else feels at least 10 years out of date. 

But then, as we all know there are a lot of games which are remarkably good and have enjoyed phenomenal success with pretty rudimentary graphics, so let’s not dwell too long there. Graphics aren’t everything. Gameplay is king, so let’s move on to that. 

Played from the top-down perspective, our courier Frederic has to get handy with these office-workers-turned-raging-mentalists in the only way he knows how: beating them to death with anything he can get his hands on. Well, at first he literally uses his hands, but within a few seconds he’s got a hammer. And a crowbar. It’s looney bashing time! There’s no particular reason given that this office complex contains more hammers and crowbars than your local B&Q but we can overlook that because we’re too excited by the fun of using them to dispatch these crazies with them, right? Right? Sadly, no. 

Frederic, who let’s not forget is a cycle courier and therefore probably a bit agile, is either paralysed with fear, or is badly programmed. Like a blindfolded child at a birthday party swinging at a pinata, he seemingly can’t focus on enemies that are right in front of him, wildly wielding his hammer (or crowbar, or walking stick) into thin air whilst the bad guys give him a slap. This is enormously frustrating, and this is where Unstoppable really falls down.

I can overlook translation issues, I can overlook lip-sync problems, I can overlook graphics that look like they’re from cutscenes from over a decade ago. But if the core of the game is to run around smacking loons to death with tools, then I need to be able to a) run and b) well, you know, hit things. Neither of these things are consistent, or enjoyable. 

But wait! At some point you get ranged weapons – maybe they’re better? No, they aren’t. Shotguns reload at the speed of light but pistols take forever. Maybe the reload animation is based on clip size or something like that. But to be honest, I don’t really care. Because unlike translation or the ability to change control schemes, or audio mixes or even graphics, gameplay is everything, and Unstoppable just doesn’t deliver on it.

I could wax lyrical about how weapons have durability and need to be replaced, or how occasionally you go berserk and get a bit of a bullet time effect while having unlimited stamina, allowing you to ineffectually slash at the air much faster, or how you can use energy drinks and painkillers to restore your health. I could point out that the game is pretty short at 4 chapters. I could whine about the bosses at the end of each chapter, who have hitboxes the size of Texas whilst yours is like waving a paperclip around in comparison. I could tell you that I very quickly began to feel….well, nothing. 

But I’m not going to do that. What I’m going to do is sum up and go and play something else. 

Unstoppable is clearly a game that has had some effort put into it, but I can’t find any major positive feature to recommend here. Graphically, gameplay wise…. Everything-wise, it’s just disappointing. I love indie games, and I really wanted this to be good so that I could recommend you part with your hard-earned to add yet another example to your library of how AAA studios don’t have to rule the world, but not this time.

SUMMARY

Unstoppable is lacklustre and pretty boring. It’s dull. If you, for tax reasons or something, need to get rid of £10 then you could consider buying this.

Or you could get some crisps instead, which at least you’ll enjoy.

Not recommended.